I LOVE being pregnant. I know that is a bold statement. I can honestly say I am thankful for the backaches, 3 trips a night to the bathroom, bloated-ness, tight pants, and every other negative aspect of pregnancy. I have found myself tossing and turning at night thanking God for this experience and the opportunity to lie awake at night.
I know my last post was about being thankful for this pregnancy, also. But, I have become so filled with amazement and awe at what God is doing in our lives through this pregnancy.
Each time the baby moves, I can’t help but say ‘thank you, God!’ Each time, I see my rather huge stomach, I am filled with such joy (and at times wonder at how I could be so big already.)
God has truly worked a miracle in our lives by giving us our son. I know that the baby is a gift from God, and a testament to the Lord’s faithfulness and love.
As, I was thinking about writing this post, I remembered back to the time before we found out we were pregnant. I remembered the miscarriages, the months of disappointment, and the bitterness I felt toward God. My attitude then was far from what it is now. It amazes me how the Lord allows us to go down roads that are not always the ones we would choose to get to the place He wants us, broken, needy, and reliant only on Him. I do not believe that I would be at the place I am now, if it weren’t for the journey. Through this journey, I struggled to be thankful and recognize the blessings in front of me. Now, looking back though I see how God used this fertility battle to bring people and events into my life. I would have never gotten my masters, made the friends that I have, or experienced the grace and love of Jesus had we had a baby when we first started to try. A wise friend told me that the timing of God has been perfect for us, and she is so right. Who else but the Lord can plan a birth at the first of May, so a teacher has a month plus all of summer with her precious baby boy? We tried to plan and plan and plan a baby, but only God knew the perfect time for us to have a child. He knew the plans He had for us all alone, and it just took us surrendering to those plans to be blessed with our little miracle.
I am rambling, as I do so well. It amazes me the depths of our God’s grace and love, and once I start to reflect on it, I just keep going.
We have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow. I will update soon, with pictures.